What If the questions are the real answer?

"The greatest of all insights is to realize that the quest itself, not the answer, is the greatest part of knowledge." – Ralph Waldo Emerson

Hello dear readers,

Today, I woke up with so many questions, as usual, and I just felt like sharing a bit of my story with you.

It’s a story about curiosity and:

Uncertainty vs. Indecision – They can feel the same, but they’re not.

Questions – Why do we ask them? Do they bring clarity, or just more questions?

Trusting Yourself – When do we reach out for perspective, and when do we just decide to trust that nothing is wrong—that, in some way, something must be right?

Curiosity vs. Overthinking – One moves you forward, the other keeps you spinning. Knowing the difference changes everything.

Guidance is about seeing the way—not about being right.

Let’s get into it.

“The longing for certainty ... is in every human mind. But certainty is generally illusion.”-Oliver Wendell Holmes

Being curious, though, often brought me shame.

I've always had a deep need to ask questions and explore, and through this, I've realized there’s nothing wrong with me. There’s something right in the desire to understand and share.

My path hasn’t been linear, and I’m sure many can relate.
I was the youngest in my family, and somehow, I was always seen as a "mature" child—not because I was, but I just had to quickly figure out how to live in an adult world.
I was expected to grow up fast, to be more mature, and less childlike—even in school.

Being curious, though, often brought me shame. Where I grew up, asking questions was seen as a weakness, and people would laugh if you didn’t know what they knew. You were supposed to just understand things without having to ask.

I think a big part of feeling lonely as a child was my curiosity—the drive to create, explore, and experiment. I’d get punished for my unique ways of learning about life—like cutting my clothes in odd ways or burning things just to see what happened—and I was rarely celebrated for it or valued for exploring.

Over the years, I hoped my curiosity would fade, but it didn’t. It stayed and got me into trouble, not fitting in.
I kept asking questions, mostly to myself in solitude, rarely sharing my ideas. I spent a lot of time away from judgment, trying to avoid that feeling of something being "wrong" with me.

The word question comes from the Latin word "quaestio",
which means "a seeking”.

Part of introversion, unfortunately for many, as it was for me, comes from learning to hide the parts of ourselves that don’t fit into what society is willing to talk about—to only share what is easy to understand, acceptable, and comfortable for others.

But if we're lucky, we come to terms with the fact that we’re just not for everyone, we face our fear of being rejected. (next post topic)

Your story is precious, and not everyone gets an intimate seat at your beautiful table—you decide who earns it.

In society, we’re expected to be consistent, smart, and successful without always having the resources or access to proper education or support, or being accepted in our nuances and questions.
We’re just supposed to figure it out without asking for help.
Adults expect children to be like them, and children just want adults to hear their questions and play along.

“I have no special talent. I am only passionately curious.” – Albert Einstein

“Had I not created my whole world, I would certainly have died in other people’s.”- Anaïs Nin //copyright@katerina nedelcu

It took me a while, but through my questions, I arrived at a modest conclusion:

We are weak, and that is exactly our human strength.

Not acknowledging what’s within yourself is not acknowledging it in others, either.

This reminds me of a interview i saw with the film director Krzysztof Kieślowski and he said something that stayed with me:

"People are ashamed of being weak; they try to show that they are strong, and this is why they feel so lonely—because they are left alone with their problems, too ashamed to share them with anyone. All the films I make are about the need to open up, the need to communicate on a deeper level, rather than talking about good wine, car prices, housing costs, or the best bank deposits.
You have to break through the barrier of shame and the feeling that you must not be weak."

Drawing helps me "see" what is not there yet and be okay with not having everything figured out.// copyright @katerina nedelcu

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Learning how to be okay without clarity and be oky with asking questions.

Uncertainty and Indecision – they both feel like parts of life we just can't escape, right? But what if we look at them a little differently?

Uncertainty
Certus comes from the verb cernere, meaning "to distinguish," which implies having a clear idea or certainty. The prefix in- negates that, leading to "not certain” /"unsure."

Indecision comes from the late 16th century, originating from Latin indecisio meaning "a lack of decision."

Decidere is from de- (meaning "off") + caedere (meaning "to cut").
Essentially, "indecision" means not cutting off other options, being unable to make a clear choice.

Uncertainty is a state of not being sure about something—it means having no definite knowledge or outcome.
It’s a lack of clarity about the future, yet it’s a natural part of life. We face it every day, and still, we keep going.

Its role is to push us, to make us curious—it’s a driving force for discovery. Understanding the unknown is what has shaped and moved us as a civilization. Facing life’s unpredictability helps us adapt, stay flexible, and build resilience. Accepting that life is inherently uncertain means recognizing that we can’t control everything—and that’s how we stay present.

There is no guarantee of tomorrow, and in that, we find the freedom of now.

“Some people say, "How can you live without knowing?" I do not know what they mean. I always live without knowing. That is easy.
How you get to know is what I want to know.”
The Meaning of it All (1999)-Richard Feynman

The difference between uncertainty and indecision is that uncertainty arises when we don’t yet have enough information to make a clear choice. But that doesn’t mean action is always required.
We learn to live in the “unknown,” allowing uncertainty to exist without the immediate pressure to decide or act.

Indecision is the state in which we feel unable to make a decision. It’s a mental paralysis. You know the options available to you, but you’re unsure which one to choose. It leads to hesitation and procrastination, especially when the stakes are high. It has a cognitive growth effect: when we feel stuck, it’s a moment to reevaluate what matters most before making a decision and to look deeply at one’s values and desires.

It’s an indicator of our fears, of making the wrong choice and facing negative outcomes, triggering a cycle of overthinking and second-guessing.

Being indecisive can force you to stay put and miss the opportunity to "fail," and in failure, you learn self-confidence and self-trust—not by avoiding life.

"The greatest mistake you can make in life is to be continually fearing you will make one." – Elbert Hubbard

Recognizing the difference is important: when we need more clarity and when we simply need to trust ourselves, trust life and take a step forward—because sometimes, any step is better than standing still.

Curiosity propels you forward; overthinking keeps you stuck.

Curiosity asks, "What could this mean?" with an open heart, while overthinking says, "What if this happens?" and gets lost in endless scenarios.

Curiosity is that quiet childlike force that keeps us in motion or allows us to pause, to reflect, and to sit with the not knowing. It's not just about obsessively chasing more or gathering answers.
Trusting that sometimes the answers come through stillness, not just through constant doing.

The word "curiosity" comes from the Latin word curiositas, which means
"desire to know"-a concern to understand and explore the world around us.

And that brings me to why I do what I do—why guiding chose me in ways I never expected. Each piece of the puzzle, no matter how unrelated it seemed at the time, found its place.

"Don't ask yourself what the world needs. Ask yourself what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive." — Howard Thurman// copyright@katerina nedelcu

"Guidance" comes from the Old French guider, meaning "to lead," which traces back to witan, meaning "to see." Oh, boy, I’ve seen so much in this life as a photographer, but I’ve seen even more beauty in my secret life.

For me, guidance is about seeing the way—not about being right.
There’s no right or wrong in seeing; it’s simply about what is, or learning to open up and see.

A little context

Life has steered me in many directions, but over time, I learned that the questions were where I truly found myself.

“Life shrinks or expands according to one’s courage.”-Anais Nin

I’ve witnessed a lot of suffering around me—poverty, trauma, and collective pain. Growing up, I watched my mother endure sickness and pain, and I lived with a constant fear, always waiting for something to happen to her.

That fear deeply affected my ability to simply be a child.
I lost sleep, spent my days with my mind racing, wondering if I’d wake up to find everything changed. I struggled to focus in school because a part of me was always elsewhere, worrying about what could go wrong. And yet, in those dark, uncertain moments, I learned to ask questions—about life, about suffering, about resilience—and those questions led me to this point.

It was in the asking, the curiosity, the constant search for meaning, that I found the answers to keep going. The knowledge I gained from facing those fears and asking uncomfortable questions is something I hold deeply now. It taught me about the value of reflection and seeing life from many, many angles.

And the most important thing I’ve learned is this: that nothing is wasted.
Every piece of pain, every moment of uncertainty, every joy, and win, has shaped who I am today- a human being who has with a lot to offer and a lot to ask and question.

“Someone I loved once gave me a box full of darkness. It took me years to understand that this too, was a gift.” ― Mary Oliver

I write (and guide) about everything that makes us human because, at our core, we are profound sexual beings.

Our sexuality is part of everything we are—our biology, our history, our cosmic origin… It’s not just about desire or attraction; it shapes who we are at the core.
The way we experience and express it is influenced by culture, society, and environment. It’s all connected, flowing through every aspect of our lives, our libido, the force of all life.

My journey has been filled with a vast array of studies and experiences that have touched on all these aspects. I’ve understood geology, chemistry, and scientific concepts, even with my degree in mechanics.

I’ve explored the origins of life through paleontology and paleobotany. I’ve ventured into graphic design, IT, photography, ran a plant shop, sold garden items around my country, created jewelry using gold and silver, and dived into Alchemy. I’ve even opened a paper shop, making flower paper, botanical illustration and wedding invitations. Now I train in working with intuition through dreams, Tarot and being a herbalist.

The list could go on (forever), and yet psychology, philosophy and research of how nature works overall have always been constants in my life, since I was a child.

In each of these experiences, I’ve sought to understand the complexity of the human spirit, the forces that shape us, and how everything—from the most ancient origins to the way we create, love, and express ourselves—interconnects.

Sexuality, in its most profound sense, is understanding life.
It is the lens through which we see and interact with the world, in all its messy, beautiful complexity.

Having the bravery to ask for a new perspective is to truly see your own uniqueness.

Guiding is about helping others see their own reflection—without distortion, judgment, or shame.

For me, being a photographer made it easy to slide into this role of a guide. It was never just about the image—it was about seeing beyond it.

What we do, in life or work, is a reflection of who we are and what we need- can be metaphors for our gifts, our questions, our struggles, and our growth. Even when we’re stuck in something we don’t love, there’s a reason we keep doing it- indecision maybe.

And I only wish that others could see themselves the way I see them—You don’t have to have all the answers, but being open to the questions is where your true power lies.

It’s easy to get caught in the idea that we need to have everything figured out — that we need a rigid plan to succeed.

What do you think—how has your experience guided you so far? Do you ask the questions?

From me to you:):
Keep asking the questions, keep doubting, keep discerning and curating, keep building and creating a life of your own. Keep making ART and witch craft.
Keep finding silence, pause, and rest. Keep wondering every time, even if you annoy the people around you. Keep being you or building yourself up from scratch, and the world will become a better place.

And if, in all of this, you find yourself dealing with too much confusion and don’t know where to start or how to ask the right questions, I’m here to guide you.
I see you, and you can find me in person or online for a free clarity call—just one click away from connecting.

P.S. I’ve launched my website (yey), where I’ll be offering free calls or one-on-one meetings, both in person and online, about botanical drawing, herbalism, guiding, photography, or anything else that comes to mind—nothing is random. You can check it out here. I look forward to meeting you beyond the words.

Thank you for reading and for being curious <3!

So, thank you for your kind words, your subscriptions, your feedback, and your creative work. It means a lot to me and truly helps me along this journey to be supported and inspired by you!